10 Ways To Be Kind to Your {Postpartum} Self

I really like this article of Rachel–educational, inspiring and straightforward.

To all mothers out there, please check this out. Thanks!

The Buttercup Lamb

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I am so happy I’m not pregnant right now. (These past 9 months haven’t exactly been a cakewalk.)

But with this truth comes reality…

I am now postpartum.

If you’ve been postpartum before, then you are familiar with that time of transition. Going from the joy and wonder of pregnancy and birth, to the time of healing afterwards.

The squishy belly. The aching you-know-what. Swollen ankels. Aching back. The after birth contractions. The super attractive mesh panties. And the fatigue. The list goes on!

The postpartum stage is rough. As a first-time mom, it can be hard to prepare for this. I surely had no idea what to expect when I gave birth to my son 6 years ago.

Even as a 3rd time mom, this transition is still a little new to me. So when I was at the hospital I thought to myself, “how can I, and…

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Sorrow, No More!

Hating this feeling of dejection,

Trying to end the misery.

Showing my full dominion,

Claiming I am worthy.

Proving my action,

Doing firmly.

Moving on,

Surely.

Soon.

When Light fades

The bright light is fading,

We succumb to weeping,

Darkness is coming,

Suddenly, blindness devours our being.

We’re not on high,

Now we live with sigh,

For the light bids goodbye,

We kneel down and cry.

Comfort is all we need,

For our loving light has to fade,

Broken we may seem,

Now, we sing a desolate hymn.

The little light finally meets the real source of Light, our Host.

Then, she will never be lost.

Finally, she won’t feel aghast,

Cries will end at last!

By j. Lorenzin

(This sad poem of mine is dedicated to my dearest Mamay who finally met the real Source of Light and Life a decade ago. I miss you so much, Mamay. May your soul continue to be at peace in God’s loving hands.)

It all started with a ‘Pho’

Being an expat in Hongkong is not that easy.

New culture. Different lifestyle. Difficult language. No friends–these summed up my first two months in Hongkong.

Boredom and homesickness were my companions. My husband was most of the time at work and sadly, we only had much time at night, during weekends or holidays.

I was longing for my family and close friends back then. For an extrovert like me, this I tell you, it’s really hard to be alone. Thank goodness! There were Facebook messenger, Twitter, and Whatsapp for communication purposes.

One day, my husband asked me if I wanted to meet the Filipina wife of his colleague. Of course, I said YES. I had been waiting for that moment to happen, the moment which could possibly give me new friends.

Her name’s Ruth. She’s a wife of a Hongkong national working in the same company with my husband.

Before I met Ate Ruth personally, her husband messaged me on Facebook. He asked if it’s ok with me to meet Ate because she’s also alone and bored. Woooaahh, we were in the same boat huh. Anyway, he gave me her number and told me about his high hope of me being friends with Ate.

Our supposed meeting in the first week of November was postponed because I went to the Philippines for a short vacation.

It was in the last week of November that I met her and her then-one-month-old baby boy. Our rendezvous was at New Town Plaza in Sha Tin. She’s very nice and accommodating, something that really made me think she’s the one I’ve been waiting for in Hongkong haha.

My new friend and I strolled around some shops. You know, women and shopping sounded almost the same! hahahaha just kidding. I wanted to buy some nice clothes then, and gladly, she helped me decide on which clothes to take.

We had our merienda at Viet’s Choice, her favorite restaurant. It was my first time to eat in a Vietnamese restaurant.

Oh, how I liked the delicious taste of the Vietnamese noodle soup called pho. The rich, savory taste of its soup base, the yummy combination of ginger, fresh mint, cilantro, onions and other herbs, the flavoursome chicken meat, and the good taste of the flat, long rice noodles caught the attention of my picky tastebuds.

My favorite kind of Pho. Sliced Vietnamese ham gio lua Pho with iced milk tea

Another kind of Pho. Sliced beef brisket Pho with hot milk tea

Of course, I ordered my favorite milk tea. It’s always my choice of drink whenever I was in an Asian or local restaurant.

I was really glad Ate Ruth chose Viet’s Choice. We really had a great time eating and having conversation there. In addition to that, we also discovered that we shared some common traits. Nice to know!

Who would have thought that the start of a good and strong fellowship just happened in a restaurant called Viet’s Choice? It was indeed a special place for Ate and me.

Fast forward to the present —–

Oh, how I miss eating pho and drinking milk tea.

And…

how I miss my close friend.

Like what I’ve said, it’s not that easy to be an expat in Hongkong, but because of the presence of Ate Ruth and her family, my social life in Hongkong became colorful. 😀

I do hope to see her again in the future. Guess where? In Hongkong or maybe in the Philippines.

Time flies so fast. For sure, we will see Ate Ruth again. Maybe not so soon, but definitely after a few years.

But for now, hello Facebook and Whatsapp! hahaha

Time to pause for a while and eat some dinner.

Gute Nacht. Bis Morgen.

JL

Future Hurray

Surely, mixed emotions will be felt,

But more of happiness indeed.

Can’t wait for the big day,

When everyone’s gonna say “Hurray!”

Tears and joy will flood,

When I finally become a mom, and he a dad.

Five months to go, guys,

Until we hear the little cutie cries.

Future hurray it is,

Yes, I’ll just wait for our wonderful bliss!

(This poem is dedicated to my little bunny. Written in November 2016)

By j. Lorenzin © 2019

Dilemma

Disdain emanates

for it is never hidden;

angst bursts,

for it is never controlled.

The darkness comes to life,

it dwindles the afterglow;

the scattered blocks continue to hinder,

Can light still triumph?

 

By j. Lorenzin © 2019

Blotted Soul

“Mistreated..

Misplaced..

Misunderstood..

Mistaken..

Underestimated..”

a part of Pink’s song entitled F***n Perfect

I never thought that I would be mistreated by some people I barely knew. I never thought that I would be misplaced in a place called darkness. I never thought that I would be misunderstood by few people whom I really trusted. Mistaken? Yes, indeed. Underestimated? Unfortunately, yes.

Many painful experiences have blotted my very soul. These awful experiences have made me so hopeless, weak and numb. The catastrophes have weakened my faith. Truly, these catastrophes have rendered me lonely.

Such painful experiences and dilemmas have brought scars into life. The vigor that I have had before and the valor that I have shown were nothing compared to hundreds of failures and disappointments I’ve had.

I was standing alone in my room, begging for a miracle to happen. I was asking myself, “What have I done to deserve such ill fate?”

Truly, scars were shouting and starting to kill me, little by little. I had no one to turn to. Again, no one. Such a sad reality.

Suddenly, one deep voice calmly uttered, “My child, I have never underestimated you nor mistreated you. You were never misplaced in my kingdom. You’re loved.”

I was really shocked and confused. Who uttered those strong words? Who touched my heart?

“I am Your Lord and Savior. Even when you’re blotted with sins, I still love you. Remember, I love you at your darkest,” God said.

I felt ashamed and I cried a lot after hearing Him spoke to me. In the blink of an eye, I realized my mistakes. I was really wrong for being faithless and hopeless.

At once, I knelt down and prayed for forgiveness. Yes, God’s with me and He loved me for whatever sins I’ve committed.

With great faith, I can now say these words:

“I am not mistreated. I am not misplaced. I am not misunderstood. I am not mistaken and I am never underestimated.”

Blotted soul, NO MORE!

By j. Lorenzin

Doner kebab please..

HERE I am again, craving for food in the middle of the night. How unlucky huh!

Hearing the grumbling of my stomach, I decided to stop my Google search for noodles and kebab. Why? Obviously, the photos of yummy noodles like ramen and pho, and of mouthwatering kebabs such as Doner kebab, mixed kebab, and chicken tikka kebab just made me hungry.

I remember……

When I was still in Hongkong, my husband used to order food via the Foodpanda. We had food order almost every week, especially Sunday. One thing we liked to order was the kebab from Ebenezeer’s Kebabs and Pizzeria and from Tasty Bites.

The abovementioned restaurants really delivered us what we liked—- DELICIOUS KEBABS!

To be honest, two of my favorites are the pho and Doner kebab, but let me focus first on the latter. I would dedicate another blog post for Pho. And that’s a promise, ladies and gents!

So, going back to kebabs, I really liked the taste of the Doner kebab of Ebenezeer’s and mixed kebab of Tasty Bites. Whenever my husband asked me which kebab I would take, of course I picked my perfect choice — Doner kebab.

Doner kebab. Photo credits to Ebeneezer’s Kebab and Pizzeria

I missed the distinct taste of the roasted lamb meat in Lebanese pita bread adorned with tasty spices. It’s perfect! (a little exaggeration won’t hurt, right? Haha)

Anway, I couldn’t believe that I almost drooled just the thought of my favorite kebab. Another exaggeration, of course. 😀

Empty stomach could surely make you nuts. Sad but true. Right?

But seriously, I’m hungryyyyyyyyyyyyy!

I wanted to search for Doner kebab near me……….. but hey, it’s almost midnight here in Central Europe and it’s Sunday tomorrow. It would just frustrate me more. No, thanks!

Maybe, oh just maybe, when my dearest husband is here, we can go to a Kebab restaurant nearby. Keeping my fingers crossed again.

Hmmm, eleven more days to go.

Ja… Schnell, Schnell, schnell!

Wait, I have to end this hopeless thought and finish my blog entry before I lose my wits (hahah just kidding). Time to go to bed, peeps.

Gute Nacht. Bis Morgen.

JL

Ashamed

THE face is hidden,

Ashamed of being open.

Every contour of her visage shows no confidence.

Every gesture signals her weakness.

Low self-esteem covers her persona.

Ashamed of what?

Silence screams.

Ashamed of whom?

Tears flow.

Aloofness devours her being.

By j. Lorenzin